Badges of honor

"Mom, what's that hanging from your arms?"


"Huh?"


"Mom, c'mon, you have to know what I'm talking about.  It looks awful.  It's on the back part of your upper arm.  It just hangs there.  Gross......!"


"Oooohhhh...... you mean my 'batwings'?  I'm very proud of those, thanks for noticing."


"Mom, you are sooooo weird...."


(As I write this, my husband is reading over my shoulder.  His comment as he flaps his arms like a bird: "Look at me, I'm a beautiful butterfly!  Look at me flap my wings, far away from the fat caterpillar I was!" )


*********************************************************************


Part of losing a large amount of weight is dealing with certain elasticity issues.  At first, I was pretty bothered by this, but I now see my "batwings" as another example of progress.  Embracing flaws is important.  And I have many, but physical flaws created by my weight loss aren't flaws at all: they are improvements.  Or maybe they could be called mile-markers.  Or gauges.  Or badges of honor.  


I prefer to think of my "batwings" as badges of honor.  And I wear them with pride and in honor of my family and friends.  Yes, it's me who has decided what food to eat and what exercising to do, but it is the support of my family and friends that has gotten me this far.  And it is that same support that will ensure my long-term success.  


I'm hoping some day my "elasticity issues" take care of themselves.  If not, there may be surgical options, but I am hoping this won't be the case.  But I know if that is what has to be that I have the support of the most wonderful people.  


So I'd like to take a moment to give thanks:


To my husband: Thank you for giving me unconditional love and support and making this journey more fun than I have a right for it to be.  And sharing your pizza with me; even when I shouldn't eat it but really want it.  And so I do.  And you don't judge me; you smile, willing to share.  


For Trey (my oldest son): Thank you for keeping me accountable to me.  You may be taller now, but I love that you still know I'm your mom and I can still take you down.  


For Anna (my only daughter): Thank you for helping me cook and helping me remember that deep down, I'm still just a girl.  I just have more responsibility now.  I hope you don't have the weight struggle I have had.  But if you do, I'm here for you and am happy to help you in any way I can.  


For Nathan (my second son):  Thank you for being you.  I know you're only five, but you have made me laugh more in your short five years than most people I've known for five times that amount.  And thanks for being the first to tell me my "batwings" were awesome!


For Gabriel (my last baby): Thank you for being so sweet and cuddly and funny.  Thank you for not wanting to eat what I feed you most days and instead wanting the food on my plate.  I'm sure that's helped me lose weight, too.  


For my mom: I'm speechless.  I really don't know what to say.  So I will just say I'm glad God gave me to you so long ago.  He knew we'd be good together.


For my other family and friends: Thank you for all your kind words and support.  I'm so lucky to know such wonderful people and I thank God for all of you every day. 


Ok....now I'll quit my Oscar speech.......and wear my badges of honor with pride.